Though you’re sad you’re getting older
(Those gray hairs are here to stay)
Thought I’d just come and remind you
Sixty is not too far away
—
It seems I might be in a bind
A pressing question on my mind:
Now that you’re far out over the hill
Have you finally put me in your will?
—
Getting older is such a bore
Do you even count the years anymore?
If it hurts you to the core
Just know you could still pass for 54
—
I can’t believe it’s come so soon
Already 55, what a riot
I’m glad I’m so much younger
About your age, I’ll keep it quiet
—
Each new birthday brings new cheers
Parties, gifts and happy faces
The difference is now you wake up
With your body parts in different places
—
Aging was never meant to be fun
But after all is said and done
Everything turns out just fine
Only with more wrinkles and lines
—
The perfect gift for which I looked
With so much care and thought
Even after all the time it took
This card was all I bought
—
So much joy and anticipation
As your day draws closer near
I’m still waiting for the invitation
To the party you had last year
—
I sort of forgot your birthday
Even still I hope it’s great
I also hope you don’t mind
That your gift is two days late
—
At 55 years old you’ve had so much time to learn
While you may be proud of that age
I’m dreading my own turn
—
After all the waiting
Your birthday is finally here
My favorite part about that is
I actually remembered this year
—
Celebrating your 55th year
May your birthday be divine
I wanted to wish you love and joy
(Now make sure you don’t forget mine)
—
There’s nothing wrong with aging
It’s just a number, who cares?
We have so much planned for—
Wait, is that a gray hair right there?
—
The grandkids tried to buy a gift
And after all that we had done
We pulled together all our money
And could only afford a homemade one
—
The 50s are the 40s of today
At least that’s all the rage
You can be a decade younger!
But that still makes you middle aged
—
So much time to grow and thrive
Years gone right before my eyes
I recall back when you were 25
Only we were half the dress size
—
I hope that as you’ve aged
You’ve become a regular sage
Otherwise it would probably have to sting
To be this old and not learn a thing
—
Choosing your gift was a task
That I attacked with passion and hunger
Oh, what was that you asked?
No, sorry I can’t make you any younger
—
I thought about what to buy you
Shoes? A necklace? A purse?
I know you don’t like getting older
But by this point, it can’t hurt much worse
—
I know you don’t like a fuss to be made
When you celebrate your special day
This works out really well because
I didn’t get a gift anyway